Coming of Age: A Decade in Time

The first decade of the new millennium was a realization as I stepped of the comfort of school life and structured learning into the big bad world. Everything that I have to show for myself, I earned in these ten long years, right from my degrees to my new family life. Whether for better or for worse, only time can tell. However, here are some of the lessons I learnt through this beautiful and gruelling decade, with the best of companions that God handpicked, just for me! Hopefully the next decade goes a bit easy on me.

  1. It is good to believe. Faith however is optional.
  2. Blood is thicker than water; even then it flows smoothly continuously and without jerks, despite distances and differences.
  3. A sibling is the best gift god gives you. He tops it with an amazing life-partner!
  4. You can’t choose your relatives or co-workers, but choose friends wisely.
  5. A friend in need, most often than never, is an opportunist in disguise.
  6. Pay compliments without malice and in goodtime. A delayed compliment often translates into jealously.
  7. Actions without expectations are the best. It helps you keep anxiety in check.
  8. Revenge is the strongest emotion of all, but karma always wins.
  9. Keep prejudices at bay. That way your mind doesn’t lie to you.
  10. Never stock up any emotions. Laugh when something’s funny, cry when you’re sad, and yell when you’re angry. But never displace it to the wrong person; not even yourself.
  11. Enjoy everything in its entirety, it’s easier to analyse and dissect later.
  12. A regret of action can be rectified, but a time bound regret can’t. Do all that you want in good time and with foresight; ‘could have beens’ and ‘should have beens’ are very difficult to live with.
  13. Be open to change, but learn to draw the line subtly.
  14. Inquisitiveness is good if your questions are answered; most often than never.
  15. It’s good to have perspectives, but be cautious when sharing them.
  16. Never hate someone who has a point of view and has the courage to express it too. Such people are difficult to come by.
  17. Never put your self in someone else’s shoes, they will end up blaming you for stealing them; extra pairs of shoes are not always good.
  18. For all the bad things you do, your children pay the price. Be better parents for them right from the start.
  19. Have an imagination; it becomes easier to appreciate the finer things in life.
  20. To have a healthy love life, you need to be the closest of friends for life.
  21. Love is always between equals.
  22. You need to be truly blessed to love unconditionally and not be taken for granted in return.
  23. It is healthy to hold on to memories. Sometime it’s all you have.
  24. It’s never too late to grieve for a loss. Realisation is not always sudden.
  25. Professionalism is not the best of virtues to have, but it guarantees you sound sleep every night.
  26. Speak your mind, but choose your words.
  27. Don’t expect perfection, only aim for it. That way you will still like yourself in the end.
  28. Its better to fantasize than procrastinate that too while appearing to be busy. That’s what multitasking is all about!
  29. Don’t wear your heart on your sleeve, being smart is better than being intelligent.
  30. It’s easier to remember nightmares in detail, but dreams are very forgettable. Same goes for joys and sorrows.
  31.  Dogs love you unconditionally, even if you don’t feed them or play with them everyday.
  32. A relationship that can stand the test of geographical distances and get better despite of the void is for keeps.
  33. When you love unconditionally, there are only random acts of kindness, no sacrifices of compromises.
  34. There are no such things as rose-tinted glasses; the world is full of cynics who are negative. Positivism is, at times, overrated.
  35. Competition is never healthy. You feel the guilt despite winning or losing.
  36. Avoid monetizing your hobby; the very essence of its de-stressing nature is lost. Make money from your second most favourite thing instead.
  37. All the questions of life come with options. But at times, you get the results the hard way.
  38. Never say no to anyone. Whether you carry out the deed is a different thing altogether. Save yourself the energy of getting into meaningless arguments that leave a bitter taste without doing any good.
  39. Keep your eyes and ears open, and your mouth shut. You need to use only your ears and shut your brain when criticism comes about.
  40. Don’t try to change the world all by yourself. It’s quite capable to do so by itself and that too at a blistering pace that you don’t even notice!
  41. You can’t make everybody like you. Settle with liking yourself to start with.
  42. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, especially when you are suicidal.
  43. Work is the worse thing to get addicted to. Detached attachment is the best medicine.
  44. No one but you can decide your own calibre. Others just try to clip your wings.
  45. Honesty is the best policy only if it doesn’t get you into trouble.
  46. It’s good to be punctual, even if no one else is. It goes a long way.
  47. Create a happy place in your mind. It helps you switch off your mind and wander away when in boring meetings. But cultivate sharp reflexes before that.
  48. Read across genres. You never know what you would end up enjoying.
  49. You can never learn from another’s mistakes, you got to make them all yourself and learn things the hard way. But it’s important to get the best out of every folly you commit.
  50. ‘I am sorry’ is the most powerful of statement. Even without any emotional backing, it helps you save energy for more important decisions in life.

La Amour Éternel: The Unquestioned Relationship

Some people are very lucky to have lived a life with someone they loved so deeply and with so much zest and got loved with the same fervor in return, that too without asking for it. We call their love stories as fairly tales, as everyone longs but few are chosen to live them; yet some throw it away yearning for more, always testing resistance of their relationship. They come in all shapes and sizes, as brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, friends and foes, lovers and admirers.

When a mother gives birth to a child, she has her own reason to shower a child with safety and affection. But the child responds and comprehends only with unconditional love; trust and faith have no influence on that young mind.

These relationships don’t come with faith and trust. They start as admiration and the hope and reliance just come in by themselves.  Attaching any other emotion to such a love is unnecessary. Such bonds last for eternity, beyond all forces of nature: always pure and insatiable.

P.S.: The title is French for “The Eternal Love”.

I discovered this song “Two Hearts” by Jennifer Avalon & Noel Boland. The song describes the unison of two souls in heaven, and how they decide to stay together for eternity and plan a future beyond their physical existence. And then there are always angels that bring in the “coincidences” that help lost lovers meet time after time.

Two Hearts
In a garden where the jasmine blooms
Underneath a sapphire moon
Two lovers with the Universe in their eyes

As they wander by a flowing stream
Open hands weaving crystal dreams
Making plans for the future days of their lives

Through time they’ve never let go
The past a circle that comes around
A dance that both of them know
They’ll meet again on solid ground

Two hearts that beat as one
Their journey’s only begun
Two hearts that beat as one
Let no man put asunder

The clouds lift and the sky is blue
Angel’s whisper what they’re gonna do
Bring together these blessed two, to be found

Their souls will join once again,
When Heaven tells them where and when

(Repeat Chorus)

Let no man put asunder
Two lives so laced with wonder
What God has brought together, lasts forever

Hope you had the time of your life!

The year has gone by, and while I don’t really enjoy all the pressure to celebrate, I can’t help but reminisce about the year that went by!

For starters, the Earth just turned 2010 years old since Jesus Christ left for his heavenly abode. Spinning around for so long, it’s about time she starts complaining, which explains all the natural disasters, calamities and we as her children haven’t been to kind with her either. But out with the negative. There are enough preachers in the world trying in vain to protect the environment from damnation.

But nature in itself is a great leveler. You just need to open your eyes and feel with all your senses. What you lose in one form is always compensated in another. If you lost a job, you got friends who drink with you and pay for your drinks just to spend some quality time with you. If you didn’t manage to get your dream house, you got a partner who makes you crave to go back to the home you made together. If you lost out on friends, you got relationships to last all seasons instead. If your daily travel is a drag, you got travel mates to make it fun!

When you decide to weigh your balance sheet now, your blessings will be equal to the curses, but it balance will always tip over in the favor of your blessings! Guess it’s a good time to count your blessings and invite a new year in the chapter of Mother Earth’s life with open arms. Celebrate her birthday in style! This song by Green Day says it all, read and judge for yourself…Happy New Year!!

Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)
Another turning point
A fork stuck in the road

Time grabs you by the wrist
Directs you where to go
So make the best of this test
And don’t ask why
It’s not a question
But a lesson learned in time

It’s something unpredictable
But in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life

So take the photographs
And still-frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf
In good health and good time

Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it’s worth
It was worth all the while

It’s something unpredictable
But in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life (x3)

Freedom: A Bestowed Responsibility

flying lanternsFreedom will be the ‘in’ word soon with Independence Day just around the corner. The Constitution of India has painstakingly ensured that each citizen or any person on the Indian soil is treated and tried for the actions he has done as an individual and not actions taken by a cult or mob that he is a part of.

If the nation as an entity can protect and consider us in an individual capacity, is it fair for sects – religious, or otherwise – to use this as a shield for their selfish motives?

People usually talk about freedom of speech, but fail to realize that by wagging their tongue incessantly about another’s affairs, they are violating another right of leading a life with dignity and liberty. Everyone enjoys a good gossip at the cost of the other, without realizing the implications voicing their opinion. So be it the person sitting in the next cubicle, or a celluloid actor, there is an urgent need for restraint.

Let us begin with ourselves as “Mahatma Gandhi” once said, “Be the change to want to see in the world”. We also need to voice and control our opinions about what we see and hear.

And keeping in mind the large scheme of things, the media should also curb its enthusiasm, since it has a far stronger reach and a more gripping effect on those especially, who are low on literacy. Depiction of certain incidents has been in very bad taste keeping in mind the general audience and they tend to have a very damning effect on those who are easily convinced. The media today have a gift of changing the ways we perceive the incidents that occur around us and thus they need to act more responsibly and respect the sensibilities of their viewers on the whole.

And like an age old idiom goes, live and let live…let that be the way we lead our lives, caring yet aloof about secrets which are not ours to share but a promise that one needs to hold on to.